Brain Fog: I thought it was Thursday, and other thoughts on mental fuzziness

Brain Fog
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Is brain fog real, or is it all just in your mind? Read on for 10 potential causes of brain fog.

My editor and I were scheduled to have an important conversation on Thursday at 9:00 a.m. Pacific Time. This morning, I made my coffee and kept my cell phone by my side, armed with a notebook and pen to take down her brilliant advice.

I sat and stared at the phone. I tried to work but I didn’t get much done. At 10:05, I emailed my editor to say I was sorry we’d missed each other. I asked what would be a better time to talk. To which she replied, “I thought we decided on Thursday.”

Oh, right. It’s Wednesday. I wrote back immediately, “Aha, it’s Wednesday. Sorry. I’ve got brain fog.” Right. Just the thing your editor wants to hear.

Then I realized I’d planned my whole day around it being Thursday. I sent my son to school dressed for Field Day–which happens on Thursday. I was going to the bank, because I wouldn’t have time on Friday–and it’s Thursday. I was frantically trying to finish a project that was due to a client–yes, you guessed it–on Thursday.

But it’s Wednesday. What’s up with my brain? I have no excuse. I’m way past postpartum brain fog–seven years, to be exact. I’m not breastfeeding, a known scientific cause of brain fog. I’m so totally not pregnant. I’m not drunk, I swear. I’m not quite over-the-hill. And yet. It’s like the scene in Joe vs. the Volcano, where Tom Hanks id diagnosed with a mysterious brain cloud.

Here’s a very interesting article on brain fog by Lawrence Wislon, MD. Did you know that brain fog can be caused by toxic metals, especially copper?

It can also be caused by something called a “calcium shell,” and by vegetarianism gone haywire, and by thyroid imbalance, not to mention dehydration, liver disease, menopause (read about menopause and brain fog), and brain parasites. I have a cat, and I read that creepy article in the Atlantic Monthly, Is Your Cat Making You Crazy? Quite frankly, I’m spooked.

For now, I’m going to chalk it up to the Scotch I drank on Saturday. Not that it should have such lingering effects, but, okay, I can accept that maybe I’m just no longer cut out for Scotch.

There is, of course, one more explanation. According to the good Doctor Lawrence, one can get brain fog from too much sex. You heard me. I totally prefer that explanation, although I find it somewhat unfair that a possible medical condition has come along to threaten the number one benefit of marriage/cohabitation, that thing we all take for granted: sex on tap. Tonight, I’ll experiment with abstinence (sorry, Kev). If I wake up tomorrow and think it’s Friday, or Wednesday, or Christmas, or Groundhog Day, I’m really going to start to get worried.

More on brain fog:
Wikipedia calls it “clouding of consciousness.” That sounds lovely, actually, like a Kate Winslet/Jim Carrey movie just waiting to happen.
The folks at the brain harmony center worry that brain fog might be a modern epidemic
A shady-looking website with a 1-800 number will be happy to sell you some supplements to fix your brain fog

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Sans Serif is the blog of author Michelle Richmond.

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